First and Ninth

Music by: Sia – Soon We’ll Be Found

To Whom It May Concern:
Counting the days till I know your name.
Will you say that name, put it after mine so we become the same?
From my ring you got the size, before grand tears fell from my father’s eyes.
In love we took the ultimate prize, wouldn’t wait to begin the rest of our lives.
Without seat belts above our chests, we drove our love into each other’s breast.
We wrote our story; those pens have never been so blessed with glory.
Remember when I used to stroke your hair?
You’d look up, smile and stare.
We gave love the same, but those best times never came.
No one took the blame; all around became just an empty game.
I’ll take your silence and raise you my absence.
Tonight feels like I’m sleep walking.  Turns out its our numb lapses.
I wished you’d hold me when I’d turn my back.
Can’t see the wind, yet still we flew straight through those cracks.
I don’t have a choice but I choose you anyway.
When you run, make sure you run towards and never away.
I’d rather argue with you than make love to anyone new.
There is no love worth sharing like the love that let me share my name with you.

I once moved in with a radio personality and lived my life on the air.

I was thinking about my “used to be” and “once did” list.  I can’t help but feel like I’ve missed out on something.  Like when you miss a party and all your friends are raving about it and using inside jokes.  I guess I’ve been on both sides of the inside jokes, but the barometer of life one sets is different for each and every one of us.  What I mean is each one of us has a different expectation for our everyday and long-term lives.  Along the way we change, usually because our lives develop and we become the people we were meant to be.  Just our true selves.  The issue that I struggle with lately is the realization that although I might love where I am in life, there are things that I wish I could bring from my past.  I used to be able to do a walk over and a toe touch.  I once had the freedom to lay by the pool before I started my day.  Have you ever talked to a co-ed and remembered that college was the best time of your life?  And though it seems like just yesterday, your years of dressing like a hippy and running around without money worries are long gone.  I realize that some of my “used to be-s” are borderline absurd, but it’s a part of who I am, regardless of time and space.  Who I used to be will always be me, but I find myself resenting some of the development and change.  The only solace I have is that years from now, the fact that I used to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed won’t matter as much as the “I am” and “I am doing” list of today. 

He’s from Brooklyn.  She’s from the Bronx.  They’ll never meet, their paths will never cross.

Just crossed a crowd on Prince and Grand.  Missing moments, there she’ll stand, and never meet that lovely man.

The City keeps on moving.  We just keep on rolling on.

Board a train, always the same – climb the ferry,  hop the A.  She’s moving forward while he is forced to stay.

See your face through a window on the car train.  Went north against your tracks now I’ll never know your name.   

The City keeps on moving.  We just keep on rolling on. 

Long Island, she says, “it seems so far away”.  Drove down the highway, passed his car along the way.

He’ll walk in early, she’ll walk in late.  They’ll never speak about that second perfect date.  

The sun will rise and always set.  I’ll never know you, won’t ever get the chance to say we met.

The City keeps on moving.  We just keep on rolling on.

This is dedicated to every missed encounter in this City of millions.